My "Fathers' Day" essay - - To all fathers, everywhere, Happy Fathers’ Day

A Reprise of my most-read Fathers' Day Essay - What Kind of Father?

As a person, I have observed many examples of ‘fathers’ and regrettably more bad than good.  On a positive note, a few years ago I was particularly struck by two pieces related to fatherhood, one by LZGranderson at cnn.com, and the other by Dominic Utton at the Mail Online.

As an author, I have often created characters in a father role.  In certain of my books, the father is described after his death. In Playing the Baseball Card, the protagonist describes his father as a man who ‘made sure that his children were the most important part of his life.’

In Aiden’s Arrival: Honor Before Gold, a now-grown son describes a man who assumed a father’s role by marrying a women with two young children.  “None of us; my mother, my sister, my nephew, my niece; were related to our father and grandfather by blood, but that didn’t matter to him.  He showed us, by his example, that family is about loving people, and caring about people, and living together in a supportive way.  Not always in harmony, but always caring about your family more than anything else.  He lived that kind of life, and today we carry on with that legacy.”

In Zac and the Reluctant Prince, Book 1 of the Prince David series, the father is described this way:  “The example of his life teaches us the lessons of responsibility, obligation, commitment, dedication, loyalty, patriotism and also compassion.  In his life, he strove to be the best son he could be, the best husband he could be, the best father he could be, the best officer he could be, and the best man he could be.”

If you know your father, what do you think of him? If you knew your father, how do you remember him?

I believe a real father is one who looks into the eyes of his children, and says to them, “My life improved the day you came into my life, and my life gets better every day that you are still in my life.”  I also believe a real father is the kind of role model I’ve described in the excerpts from my books, above. 

If you have the chance to be a father, or if you are a father, how do you want to be remembered? 

To all fathers, everywhere, Happy Fathers’ Day.

... Wil ...

Family Secrets: Where We Come From

Family Secrets: Knowing where we come from. One of the most important things in our lives.


I commented on a February 26th HuffPostBooks piece, written by Lev Raphael, about Family Secrets, where he describes some shocking findings after his mother's death.  By way of a reply, I left the following comment:

Ah, the mysteries of those gone before us.  How may times do we hear of those who wish they could go back and talk to a parent, grandparent, great-grandparent, or other relative whom they knew as a child.  How many times do we wish we had asked them about their background and history, and then been aware enough to remember it or appreciate it.

And, as an author, how many times might we have wished that our mother, or father, or grandparent, or other important person in our lives might have been able to see us now, as an author.

Our lives are full of 'what ifs' or 'if onlys'.  I join with Lev in wishing to solve the mystery that was his mother's past, and wishing that she might have appreciated that he was an author.  I regret that these regrets will be among the many of our lives.  This will always be.

But there's one thing we can do, and that is to change the way we go forward, and connect with those who follow us.  I wish us all the best in making that happen.